The gift of gifts
Dec. 22nd, 2012 09:52 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
pktechgirlbackupI recently developed quite the jigsaw puzzle habit. I can go through a 500 piece puzzle in a day or two, although it scales up exponentially from there. I have funny rules for the purchase of puzzles. I will spend $70 in a go on a bunch of $12 puzzles, even though I already have more puzzles than I am likely to get to before I get bored of this. But one $17 puzzle? That is Too High for a puzzle and I will not stand for it, no matter how perfect and amazing it is.
I finally found a way out of this dilemma through trickery. My friend Ashley and I are stretching buddies, and she has agreed to buy me the puzzle if I meet my goal this month. So 1. the puzzle is a reward for something unpleasant, but that I will retroactively take pride in. 2. I'm getting a nice dose of
I finally found a way out of this dilemma through trickery. My friend Ashley and I are stretching buddies, and she has agreed to buy me the puzzle if I meet my goal this month. So 1. the puzzle is a reward for something unpleasant, but that I will retroactively take pride in. 2. I'm getting a nice dose of
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I recently developed quite the jigsaw puzzle habit. I can go through a 500 piece puzzle in a day or two, although it scales up exponentially from there. I have funny rules for the purchase of puzzles. I will spend $70 in a go on a bunch of $12 puzzles, even though I already have more puzzles than I am likely to get to before I get bored of this. But one $17 puzzle? That is Too High for a puzzle and I will not stand for it, no matter how perfect and amazing it is.
I finally found a way out of this dilemma through trickery. My friend Ashley and I are stretching buddies, and she has agreed to buy me the puzzle if I meet my goal this month. So 1. the puzzle is a reward for something unpleasant, but that I will retroactively take pride in. 2. I'm getting a nice dose of <a <href="http://pktechgirl.livejournal.com/385441.html">delayed gratification</a>. 3. I am not paying for it. Ashley is not getting screwed by this deal- if she meets her goals, I will buy her yarn. But somehow, the fact that I am not the one actually paying for it makes it all the better.
Another jigsaw puzzle based example: I have mentioned this predilection to my parents. It is actually a really elegant solution to the gift giving problem, because picking out jigsaw puzzles allows them to imprint some personality on the gift, and I will appreciate that personality even if it's something I wouldn't have picked out myself. Contrast with clothes, where they would just be funding things I had already decided to purchase. This all worked great until my dad asked if I would like several regular puzzles or one puzzle custom made from a photograph. <i>Which I would have to choose</i>. AND he told me the relative price of the custom puzzle. There are not enough caps, italics, and exclamation marks in the world to convey how much this upset me.* The point of the gift was to transfer not the cost of the puzzle from me to them, but the burden of choosing it. And now they are trying to dump that back on me? BULLSHIT.
In a story that is considerably less relatable, my company gave every employee an expensive electronic toy for the new year. It is not something I wanted before, I'm not sure I have a compelling use case for it, but I am delighted to have it. Far more delighted than if they had given me the equivalent cash value. I know this for a fact because the toy's value is a fraction of my bonus, and hearing about my bonus always makes me grumpy, due to a combination of wondering how I did relative to other people, and the fact that at my last job the bonuses were an order of magnitude higher, which is enough to buy you out of caring how you did relative to your co-workers.**
Every year around this time the behavioral econ blogs like to talk about how irrational gift giving is (with the seminal work <a href=https://www.amherst.edu/media/view/104699/original/christmas.pdf">The Deadweight Loss of Christmas</a> (warning: PDF)), because on average people place an monetary value on gifts they receive that is less than what the giver paid for them. Which is true, as far as it goes, but it overlooks many things, including the value of "not having to take responsibility for choosing to buy this thing at all" and "not beating yourself up when you learn that this was only the 3rd best vacuum, and #2 was on sale a week after you bought yours". This is not valueless.
*I am aware that this is not a proportionate response
**Note should my employers ever find this: but I like my co-workers more and get a real satisfaction from our mission.
I finally found a way out of this dilemma through trickery. My friend Ashley and I are stretching buddies, and she has agreed to buy me the puzzle if I meet my goal this month. So 1. the puzzle is a reward for something unpleasant, but that I will retroactively take pride in. 2. I'm getting a nice dose of <a <href="http://pktechgirl.livejournal.com/385441.html">delayed gratification</a>. 3. I am not paying for it. Ashley is not getting screwed by this deal- if she meets her goals, I will buy her yarn. But somehow, the fact that I am not the one actually paying for it makes it all the better.
Another jigsaw puzzle based example: I have mentioned this predilection to my parents. It is actually a really elegant solution to the gift giving problem, because picking out jigsaw puzzles allows them to imprint some personality on the gift, and I will appreciate that personality even if it's something I wouldn't have picked out myself. Contrast with clothes, where they would just be funding things I had already decided to purchase. This all worked great until my dad asked if I would like several regular puzzles or one puzzle custom made from a photograph. <i>Which I would have to choose</i>. AND he told me the relative price of the custom puzzle. There are not enough caps, italics, and exclamation marks in the world to convey how much this upset me.* The point of the gift was to transfer not the cost of the puzzle from me to them, but the burden of choosing it. And now they are trying to dump that back on me? BULLSHIT.
In a story that is considerably less relatable, my company gave every employee an expensive electronic toy for the new year. It is not something I wanted before, I'm not sure I have a compelling use case for it, but I am delighted to have it. Far more delighted than if they had given me the equivalent cash value. I know this for a fact because the toy's value is a fraction of my bonus, and hearing about my bonus always makes me grumpy, due to a combination of wondering how I did relative to other people, and the fact that at my last job the bonuses were an order of magnitude higher, which is enough to buy you out of caring how you did relative to your co-workers.**
Every year around this time the behavioral econ blogs like to talk about how irrational gift giving is (with the seminal work <a href=https://www.amherst.edu/media/view/104699/original/christmas.pdf">The Deadweight Loss of Christmas</a> (warning: PDF)), because on average people place an monetary value on gifts they receive that is less than what the giver paid for them. Which is true, as far as it goes, but it overlooks many things, including the value of "not having to take responsibility for choosing to buy this thing at all" and "not beating yourself up when you learn that this was only the 3rd best vacuum, and #2 was on sale a week after you bought yours". This is not valueless.
*I am aware that this is not a proportionate response
**Note should my employers ever find this: but I like my co-workers more and get a real satisfaction from our mission.
